“There’s man all over for you, blaming on his boots the fault of his feet.” ~Samuel Beckett
Feelings. That’s a chick thing, right? Men everywhere are getting nervous as they read this because they know they have feelings just like any little girl and it scares them to death. So the way out they make for themselves is to say it’s the other guy’s fault I feel this way.
Here is a truth that people (and especially men) are afraid to live by: You are responsible for your own feelings.
Have you ever said, “You make me so mad”? No, they don’t.
Maybe you have been schooled a bit so instead you passively aggressively said, “When you do X, it makes me angry.” But that just shifts the responsibility from your target (we’ll call them the “blamee” to your “blamer”) to the blamee’s behavior.
Either way, you have assigned responsibility out there instead of in here.
By so doing, you have delivered your power to someone else or, worse yet, to an inanimate concept associated with someone else. Could this be more obtuse?
“Who says men don’t like to talk about their feelings?” click to tweet
Do you wish you weren’t so hateful/fearful/despairing/humiliated? The straightforward solution is: don’t. Don’t feel that way. Because you get to choose how you feel. Imagine the freedom you have to just feel otherwise. Picture the power in it. Conceive of the notion that you are in charge.
When you own the truth about the source of your feelings, you create a whole new relationship with them. You because the master instead of the slave.
So when have you found it surprisingly hard to man up and take responsibility for your own feelings? How did you get past it? Tell us about it by commenting below.
Photo credit: Scarycrow